Is this public?

Berkeley (still, and hopefully for longer, but not in the same position), Thursday, March 2, 2023 7:39 PM

Why to be ashamed oneself on the “public” sphere of this web, where anyone can through darts or roses, or spit or yield, but who knows how that would pivot to the self?

I think the reason is accountability, in part? Another reason is to keep the brain busy, creative, and working while one can be tired instead on submerging in another activities, which can be distracting such as reading news, or streaming a sit-com. Both of course have benefits, but there are quite important things about the self-reflection.

On the other, how much could one really reflect? How much could one really reflect and share in public? How much do I care of what I write on those pages, while clearing my mind, and how much would this healthy exercise would affect me back, if controversies were written.

How extra baggage is to have this website on? Is an extra weight to carry on, and an additional fear or responsibility to face or stand by because I have written in here?

In any case is not only about accountability, it is also about writing stories, and about explaining where am I. Sharing some thoughts, asking some question, which would provide a premise for myself, probably, to write even a bit deeper elsewhere.

[I got distracted with my thoughtful training of thought elsewhere, and as a colleague opened a door nearby. I briefly, terms of seconds, checked a dating site as well. I still do not like those that much, because no matter what, we are emotional beings. It’s probably good to keep sensations lively, but the pool is to large, which plenty of noise, which can be distracting from day to day “targets” or events. On the other hand, those could be a call or reminder for action in the day to duties, rather to being too stuck to the desk and screen]

I probably was a bit harsh the other day, by text, to a distracting colleague. But what is distracting, should we live in the life of focus? What are my given examples, if I haven’t got done the job that I committed to yet.

Still it is not that one can create more things, or write more, and make more progress in between of a gigantic chaos of news, messages, conversations, scheduled things, etc. In my case, research requires some focus and even silence of thinking on something over a period of time. And do it actually. It also requires a clear goal. And particularly it requires, honest conversations.

I’m a bit curious of the mind of Immanuel Kant now. But life is chaos, and I has to be aware of it. Otherwise, one because less able to do stuff on the street, bus, survive on “dangerous” places, etc. Thy Will be Done.